My Little Corner of the World

My return was short-lived (or) I have a new blog

Fri, 03 Aug 2007 15:08:19 GMT

http://whatimreadingreviews.blogspot.com/

It started as a book review blog, but, because I thought all my reviews sucked, it's now home to random thoughts and (maybe) the occasional entry about what I'm reading. The idea was directly lifted from Nick Hornby's column in The Believer, which means that I really shouldn't be writing about what's currently on my shelf, but instead talk about what I've actually been doing...so maybe I've been pretty true to form.

Regardless, I won't be posting to lj anymore. I still enjoy it along with a handful of other things from my years as a teenager (the movie The Wedding Singer, chuck taylors, My So-Called Life), but I'm spent here. I'll still be reading posts, but I won't be writing anymore.

Strictly work-related

Tue, 26 Jun 2007 18:57:36 GMT

Bluetooth Troll: After working for more than a half a year in Clayton, I am not phased by most assholes with a Bluetooth. Yes, it looks stupid, and yes, it is rude to use in public, but you, Bluetooth Troll, are an exception. Not only do you use your earpiece as an excuse to conduct business outside in the courtyard (where others are trying to enjoy lunch or a cigarette), but you punctuate your conversations with a quick greeting for everyone who walks past you. You're not a politician, so I don't see the need for this mid-sentence schmoozing that you feel is so appropriate. Although this might be deemed a nicer gesture if you were legitimately friendly or mildly attractive, your short, portly stature and serial killer specs make you about as approachable as any bridge-dweller. We know that you're important because you don't adhere to the restrictions of a traditional office environment, but don't flaunt your stupidity while I'm trying to enjoy a book.

Phyllis: We are kindred spirits. I know this because I often catch you unlocking the law office across the hall as I prop open our doors in the morning. We usually exchange the tired, yet polite smile that most administrative assistants seem to share, and then return to our respective desks to direct callers and thwart telemarketers. Perhaps you don't watch The Office, but I couldn't help notice your penchant for frumpy maternal wear and a heavy application of blush. Your sheepish demeanor also indicates that perhaps you have an Angela in your life, interrupting your happiness and declaring green "whorish". I cannot be sure of this last part, but from the enthusiastic smiles I receive after complimenting you in the bathroom (Have you considered wearing more pink? I wasn't lying about that sweater.), I can only infer that you are bullied somewhere. You look like you need a hug. Let's get lunch and talk about it.

The Blondes from the Second Floor: You know who you are. Like a carefully choreographed porno, you all seem to end up in the bathroom at the same time. As one who has also been known to gossip loudly on occasion, I understand that these retreats probably make your days a little shorter, but as a complete stranger, I do not want to hear about your sexual escapades. Your attempts at whispering are appreciated, but need I remind you that this is a bathroom, and as pre-Magnolia Aimee Mann would say, "Voices Carry". In short, I'm sick of forfeiting my time in front of the hand dryer so you can talk about some douche you picked up last weekend.

Why I am usually grumpy in the morning

Wed, 20 Jun 2007 14:08:12 GMT

The worst part of my day is the ten minute commute from my apartment to the office.

I'm sure that most 8-5ers share this sentiment, but I don't dislike the drive because of the traffic or the wave of lassitude that won't disappear for at least two hours, but because my neighborhood, instead of sleepy and quiet at almost 8, is a diorama of everything I'll be missing while I'm at work. Women chat over coffee outside of Kaldi's, while others remind me of my blatant laziness as they run by, waving to the guy who owns a short parade of border collies. For some bizarre reason, even kids are out at this hour, kicking around soccer balls and trailing behind stroller-pushing parents.

Sometimes I think about what I would do if I didn't have to be at Cohesion, but even the idea of hokey is depressing. I have no dog to walk, or (thank god) kids to entertain. Sure, I'd take a nice stroll through Forest Park, finish the book I've been reading, and clean my kitchen, but I suppose that my morning routine will remain the same until I have the things that make every weekday seem like a block party I wasn't invited to. In short, I love my life right now, but it's really hard not to look at how comfortable other people are and not want that.

In order of importance:

Fri, 01 Jun 2007 19:42:55 GMT

1) I've found a pretty good egg. Scratch that---a really good egg.

2) I'm road-tripping to Chicago with Megan next weekend. There will be a ridiculous amount of touristy goodness (i.e. trips to the Shed Aquarium, the Field Museum, lots of shopping), as well as at least one night of debauchery and mayhem. I plan on maintaining a balanced weekend by spending a day with my grandparents and (possibly) an afternoon in the suburbs.

3) I have an interview at the Riverfront Times next week for an editorial assistant position. I'm not particularly unhappy at Cohesion (albeit being the go-to errand girl of the office), but I saw the job posted online and applied on a whim. They emailed me the day my resume arrived and I'm equal parts nervous and excited.

4) The third season of The Office is over. I'd be lying if I said that a summer of re-runs is just as good, but I've been watching a lot of the UK version and loving it. I haven't converted, but I think the frequent use of terms like "wanker", "twat", and "bummer" make it a bit funnier.

5) A Chipotle just opened two blocks from Cohesion. I do not see this being a good thing for my waistline.

Lip Service.

Fri, 16 Mar 2007 00:04:16 GMT

For those of you who don't know anything about my job, I spend a lot of time on hold.

A weaker person would grow tired of the endless voicemails and assistant's assistants, but I love being on hold. It gives me time to write, daydream, and (most importantly) frequent all the networking websites I shouldn't be viewing at work.

Anyway, because my job started in mid-November, most of my calls were plagued with holiday-themed tunes, usually choir versions of "Silent Night" or some other beloved classic. Saucier companies endorsed "Santa Baby" or some variation of "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree," but most adhered to the favorites. However, now that the holidays are over, companies employ one of the following trends:

1) Adult Contemporary Hits, i.e. lots of Phil Collins, Bruce Springsteen (nothing harder than "Glory Days"), Harry Connick Jr.

2) Muzak, i.e. Casio's interpretation of songs that were once recognizable

3) Radio ads for the company, i.e. voice spots feeding you reasons to use Company X, reasons to remain on hold, etc.

Today, after a forgettable rendition of "Tunnel of Love," my usual perky phone persona was interrupted by a peculiarly offensive voice spot. While waiting to speak to the operator (again), the tire company causing me to obsessively refresh my MySpace page fed me this:

"PSSSHHHHBBBB. Do you know what that sound is? That's the sound of a blown tire. The sound of a cheap, blown tire. The sound of a cheap, Chinese tire that some dealer put on your car! That's the sound of a ruined day. Buy American. Buy ______."

After roughly 40 phone calls, I began to think that I was experiencing an auditory mirage of sorts. Did that guy really refer to that tire as "Chinese?" Did he really make that noise with his mouth? Didn't John make that sound at the beginning of "Come Together?" Or was it Paul? Would they have let Ringo do it?

The Veronica Mars inside me wanted to disguise my voice and call again to confirm my suspicions, but instead I started to giggle. Here I'd spent all day on the phone, dedicating no more than two minutes to conversations with actual people, and the only thing that made me smile was an embarassingly American, horribly xenophobic recording. I contemplated emailing my co-workers, but thought better of it and spoke with the receptionist on the other end. When I reached their Marketing department, I was relieved; not because I had finally reached my destination, but because our contact is out of the office and instructed me to please call back on Monday.

It'll be just like that scene in Grease 2, but not at all.

Thu, 18 Jan 2007 17:46:39 GMT

I'm joining a bowling league. Not one of those I-have-my-own-ball-and-towel bowling leagues, but the *Fun League (yes, it's really called that) at Saratoga Lanes with Megan, Tony, and one of Tony's mystery friends. We went bowling last night and had a blast despite the fact that no one was drinking and I didn't break 100. Still, the league should be (as the name promises) fun. We're making T-shirts and after this weekend, baked goods may be involved. The league only lasts four weeks at a time, so it's not a huge commitment, but it'll really fill up my Thursdays.

*This sounds like a collection of superheroes that provides limitless amounts of fun to unsuspecting citizens. I imagine them saying things like "You there, bored at work? Impromptu dance contest!"

This reads like something you'd receive in a Christmas card, but whatever.

Fri, 12 Jan 2007 21:31:31 GMT

For those of you who I haven't kept up with, or only periodically check Facebook, here's a brief summary of what I've been doing since August.

After graduating, I accepted a job at Tribune Publishing in Columbia. I worked there for three months, loved the staff and didn't mind the work, but I desperately needed to leave. I sent out my resume daily, went on a few interviews, and took a job with Cohesion, a small advertising agency in St. Louis. I moved here in November and currently live with my Aunt Marilyn, who is pretty much the sweetest lady ever. (When I see her before work she's all "You caught me in my curlers!" It's so cute.) I'll be moving into a new apartment come next Friday, located right across from Forest Park, down the street from the Delmar Loop and Wash U. I bought a car last month (one of those smallish economy cars that are all the rage these days), and (fingers crossed) no one has broken into it yet. I'm still dating the fella from Columbia and we're hitting a year soon. I have no idea where that's going, but I imagine you'll hear a lot about it, regardless of what happens. I'm trying to keep up with my writing, but it's difficult when you don't have a computer. I've started a blog for book reviews I've written, but I'm not happy with most of them. I'll list the address somewhere once I've revised a few and sent them out. (Yes Bookslut, that means you.) Besides the basics, I'm also excited to decorate the new place and meet more people. I've been in the city for two months and have established some favorite haunts, but a little company wouldn't hurt. One of my Mizzou BFFs beat me here by a few months, and she's been amazing, but I'm definitely missing my core group of college friends.

In short, I'm kind of an adult now. I have bills to pay, a schedule to keep, and a business card that I use mostly to enter free lunch giveaways. Despite the boring nature of this entry, it's pretty exciting, and besides that, I don't have much else to say. I really need another place to write (I love you MySpace blog, but it's just not the same) and after going through some old entries the other day, I realized that I miss this. Granted, I doubt I'll post often, but it's nice to know that it's here for the occasional venting session or superfluous shit, er, survey.

I think I might start posting here again.

Tue, 09 Jan 2007 14:38:45 GMT

Just a thought.

Today I ran into someone I went to high school with, so this is oddly appropriate.

Wed, 13 Dec 2006 23:24:53 GMT

I guess this is about senior year of high school

1. Who was your best friend?
I was probably closest to Erin, but I became friends with Lindsay and hung out a lot with Michelle, Clare, and a few others.

2.What sports did you play?
Intramural volleyball. I did softball Freshman year and hated it.

3. What kind of car did you drive?
The Maxima.

4. It's Friday night, where were you?
Probably working at Target or hanging out at Mike's house, watching movies and watching his dad drink wine.

5. Were you a party animal?
God no.

6. Were you considered a flirt?
I still blushed when a boy would talk to me, so no. I have no idea how I landed a boyfriend.

7. Ever skip school?
Maybe once, but if I did it was to do something lame like see a movie.

8. Were you a nerd?
I think people thought I was a nerd, but I wasn't much smarter than they were--just quiet and unassuming.

9. Did you get suspended/expelled?
Nope.

10. Can you sing the fight song?
Nope.

11. Who was your favorite teacher?
Ms. DiMarco. I loved her because she reminded me of what I thought I would be like at her age.

12. Favorite class?
Creative Writing. We were voted the class mostly likely to smoke pot in unison.

13. What was your school's full name?
Benet Academy.

14. School mascot?
A Redwing that looked pretty aggressive for a bird.

15. Did you go to Prom?
Yep. I looked super cute too.

16. If you could go back and do it over, would you?
Maybe. I have more confidence now.

17. What do you remember most about graduation?
Taking bad pictures, wearing a dress I thought was ugly.

18. Where were you on senior skip day?
I have no idea. Probably sleeping in and reading.

19.Did you have a job your senior year?
Target.

20. Where did you go most often for lunch?
The cafeteria?

21. Have you gained weight since then?
Looking at pictures, I think I've lost weight since then.

22. What did you do after graduation?
Go to Mizzou. Cut my hair, date a couple idiots, read a lot, and graduate.

23. When did you graduate?
2002

24. Who was your Senior prom date?
Mike. He's dating a hairstylist now I think. I still call him for advice.

25. Are you going to your 10 year reunion?
If I go, I'll be tanked.

26. Who was your home room teacher?
That really bizarre woman who taught Humanities I think?

27. Who will repost this after you?
I don't know. Jon was skeptical and look what happened!

Since everyone else is doing it...

Thu, 04 May 2006 03:49:33 GMT

Your Birthdate: April 6

You tend to be a the rock in relationships - people depend on you.
Thoughtful and caring, you often put others needs first.
You aren't content to help those you know... you want to give to the world.
An idealist, you strive for positive change and dream about how much better things could be.

Your strength: Your intuition

Your weakness: You put yourself last

Your power color: Rose

Your power symbol: Cloud

Your power month: June

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

The second time.

Mon, 03 Apr 2006 06:13:20 GMT

After reading Brandon's entry about being all lj nostalgic, I decided to look through my archives and came across this little gem from '03:

"Post anything that you want, and post it anonymously. Anything.
A story, a secret, a confession, a fear, a love - anything. Be sure to post anonymously and honestly. Post twice if you'd like.
Then, put this in your LJ to see what your friends (and perhaps others who you don't even realize read your LJ) have to say."

Some of the comments made me sad, some were total lies (I'm photogenic? Someone is waaay too nice!), and others were really cute.

So humor me and post something. I don't care if it's mean, anonymous or not, or whatever. This may be an invitation for disaster, but I don't care anymore. I turn 22 this week and I can do whatever I want.

Something is nothing.

Fri, 24 Mar 2006 02:03:35 GMT

I think I belong in Boston.

They need writers and drummers and their missed connections are the cutest. ("I was on the trolley, you gave me the biggest smile.")

I think I'm going to write a free verse poem using missed connections.

It will horribly awesome.

Also, I need to stop daydreaming and start studying for this comm law exam.

I knew it.

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 17:51:36 GMT

Your Life is Like

High Fidelity

What John Cusack movie are you?

Take me now I'm yooouuurrrrssss

Thu, 09 Mar 2006 19:49:04 GMT

First, I need to stop listening to The Good Life. My mood is way too good for this album, but it's so.fucking.good.

Why the good mood, you ask?

Because I totally gave it to my American Lit midterm.

That's right.

I didn't even buy it dinner first!

Merry Christmas and all that jazz.

Sun, 25 Dec 2005 21:54:36 GMT

This is the first Christmas that hasn't started with my sister banging down my door at seven in the morning, and I don't know if I should feel depressed or wonderfully independent. I didn't eat any cookies this year, or trim my grandma's tree, or listen to my dad's horrible Bing Crosby impression. It's sad in a way, but I guess it's also part of getting older and doing my own thing...my own thing being avoiding my mother's family after almost a 50-hour work week.

Last night, I split my last few hours of Christmas Eve between sleep and Eastside, and although I had an okay time, it's strange to be in this town for the holidays. However, my parents are picking me up shortly for a delicious dinner at Tan Tara and some time with my drums, er, family. It's nice to get a day off, but that's really all Christmas is this year--a day off. I work 8-9 tomorrow, so Tuesday will be incredible. I plan on lots of sleeping and eating, and possibly finishing this bottle of kahlua.

And in case you were wondering... The point of this entry:

January can't come soon enough.

Just a thought.

Tue, 21 Jun 2005 17:43:08 GMT

Today has the potential to be the best day I've had in a long time.

I'll tumble for ya.

Fri, 20 May 2005 17:06:27 GMT

I love my job.

I spent four hours yesterday shrink-wrapping and alphabetizing. Most of the shrink-wrapping time in the backroom was also spent dancing to Culture Club, which I'm not really paid for but will gladly do anyway. I was also invited to a grad party for a couple of employees at Chevy's on Sunday, which is awesome because I love Tex Mex and it'll give me an opportunity to meet everyone. I have to drive my dad to the airport that morning, but I should be back in time for the festivities...also I'm hoping to get the lake sometime in the next two weeks because Eli's letting me keep the drums. I offered to pay him in installments, but he wouldn't have it. I still have calluses on my hands from playing for a few hours, but I sounded surprisingly tight and didn't want to stop. I can hear myself improving, but I really wish I had them around to practice...

Anyway, today is a lazy day to be spent sleeping and such. I think I'm getting sick, and I don't want to risk it, so this weekend is going to be a party. A big, lethargic party.

Oops.

Thu, 12 May 2005 23:33:40 GMT

Remember that last entry about getting a job at American Eagle?

Yeah.

Well...Slackers offered me a job and I took it.

Why?

Walking to work is appealing...the manager is the cutest lady ever...a discount on cds would be more than nice...I can wear whatever I want...

So now I need to call American Eagle and nicely decline the job I already accepted...

And break the news to my sister, who was expecting to abuse my 40% discount.

6.25 an hour, here I come.

Wed, 11 May 2005 20:48:50 GMT

I got hired at American Eagle!
And ate at Sub Shop with Brandon!
And heard Mazzy Star on the radio!
And had an interview at Slackers!

P.S. There's a tornado warning!

Why I am the Best Sister Ever (by Kelly Powers)

Thu, 05 May 2005 13:13:33 GMT

For anyone who still reads this, you may remember a brief update about the Weezer/Pixies show this month. I'm sure that it was short and excited, because I've never seen the Pixies before and still think Rivers is delicious. However, I can't report back that the evening was incredible because I FUCKING PASSED OUT.

After the opening band (who was horrible because the Pixies apparently decided not to tour with Weezer--a detail my sister "forgot" to tell me), the smelly teenagers around us who were all shamelessly hitting on each other and wearing track jackets, decided to scrunch towards the stage to get their $27's worth. About ten minutes later, I began to feel sick, so I left my sister and her friend Molly to fend for themselves while I got a bottle of water. Unfortunately I never made it to the bar because I collapsed on a staircase, had a "seizure" (the words of an inept security guard), and was revived by two attractive college boys. ( I was also applauded by a group of strangers..."She's up!! WHOOO!.") Shortly after, I was abruptly supported by two intimidating staff dudes who carried me to couple paramedics located whereverthehelltheytookme. The paramedics were two sweet ladies who gave me bottled water and showed me pictures of their kids. They also told me stories about the guys they work with, one being "Perverted Bob." (I'll leave it to you to imagine the issues they had with him.)
Anyway, after I sat in some random office for forty minutes holding ice on my face (I fell on the right side of my body so my hip, elbow, knee cap, and chin are all bruised), I headed to the bathroom to call my mom. After a brief conversation with her about it ("Kelly! I don't believe you did that!") I call Brandon to tell him because he's privy to everything, including minor medical emergencies.
So after I get off of the phone, I stay in the bathroom for another fifteen minutes, during which a drunk girl passes out by the sink. I help her up and take her to the paramedics (now that I conveniently know where they are), and make my way back to the ballroom. By now, Weezer's almost finished with their set and it's packed. I stood on the outskirts of the crowd and sang along to a couple songs in an attempt to salvage my night. I also stood next to this cute couple (the guy was wearing a Pixies shirt and the girl had cute hair) who I wanted to talk to because they looked my age, but I thought better of it. So I stuck around for the encore, all the while scouring the crowd for my sister and her friend. Because Meghan forgot her cell phone, I waited by the exit for twenty minutes before I found them. After complaining about the smell of smoke in their hair and "the sweaty guy," they followed me out and I drove them home. By the end of the evening, I had driven at least nine hours and I was exhausted, swollen, and starving.
I'm writing this all now because I can't go back to bed, even though I should because I have another seven hours of driving ahead of me today. I really don't feel like going back to Columbia, but I have an exam tomorrow at 10 and a paper to finish. My dad might drive me back because he was wanting to work at the lakehouse this week anyway, so let's hope that happens, ok?
Anyway, the moral of this story is to stay adequately hydrated, neglect to attend shows with a median age of fifteen, and try not to pass out in public.

You will only be embarrassed and injured.

There is a grammatical error in this quiz that I will let slide...but only because this is funny.

Tue, 19 Apr 2005 02:49:36 GMT

I've always been this way.

Sat, 16 Apr 2005 21:23:04 GMT

On Friday, while I was still kind of drunk from a Thursday night Brittany birthday excursion to Shakespeare's, I wake up at 11:30 to find the long-awaited b-day package from my brother. Thanks to a call from my mother, I am already 99.9% certain that it is alcohol, and I am also 100% relieved that it was not intercepted by the U.S. Postal Service. So hungover Kelly opens the box (and by "opens", I mean drags a scissors across it until enough cardboard is ripped open), and finds a huge green sweatshirt in it. In said sweatshirt are two bottles of Andre champagne, one stuffed in each sleeve. I am tempted to laugh my ass off because my brother has never believed in gift wrap, and instead perfers to roll presents in a dirty article of clothing, but I try not to. When I picture myself, standing in the middle of my room, giggling like an idiot with a huge bottle of champagne in each hand, already messed up, I am tempted not only to laugh, but to roll around and bask in the ridiculous nature of this entire past week and all the stupid shit that has decorated it. For a moment, I want to just act a fucking fool for no reason and I love it.

Anyway, I also found this list from my Senior year at Benet. I think it was a Creative Writing exercise, but I can't really be sure.

"25 Things I Want to Do Before I Die"

1) Play the guitar.
2) Have a library. In my house.
3) Learn to play the violin.
4) Live in a house where every room is a different color. Refer to these rooms by said colors.
5) Learn how to sew. (Again.)
6) Learn how to walk in heels without looking like a drag queen.
7) Be a blonde.
8) Own a vintage Volkswagon bug.
9) Live in London. Never leave.
*10) Date an artist.
11) Be featured on Great Chefs of the World.
12) Learn to play the drums.
13) Sing in a band.
14) Play tennis daily.
15) Meet a surviving Beatle.
16) Go to a bonfire on a beach.
17) Swim in the ocean. (Have the option to do this anytime.)
18) Know all the words to "Subterranean Homesick Blues."
19) Write for Rolling Stone or Spin.

Ok, so I only got to nineteen, but you get the gist. It's nice to think that I actually accomplished a handful of those, but I figure that I have a lot of time left. Also, some of these items are just plain High school Kelly, and don't really apply to College Kelly, so I am therefore exempt.

*What a bad idea.

I didn't think that story was any good.

Tue, 12 Apr 2005 14:59:40 GMT

This was one of the five emails in my inbox this morning:

"Congratulations, everybody! You're all gonna be in the new epic. At the end of each of your stories, we were hoping to put a sentence or two about you, the authors. Mostly it'll be your name, major, and academic year, but if you'd like any other information (Where you're going after graduation, what inspired the story, etc. Pretty much anything brief, relevant, and interesting) about yourself, send an email to umcasenglishepic@missouri.edu. Please respond by Wednesday if you would like to include personal information."

...blah blah blah

So...

If you were Kelly Powers, how would you describe yourself in two sentences? Is it lame to even do that? I don't know how a literary magazine works!!

Also, a wasp has taken up residence in my room and I don't want to kill it. I'm not avoiding smashing it with my copy of Wuthering Heights out of humanity, but out of fear. And I'm totally unprepared for my developmental psych exam. (Turns out, I'm afraid of a lot these days.)

I can hardly wait..baaaaby.

Mon, 11 Apr 2005 00:13:10 GMT

So it looks like I'm going to the Pixies/Weezer show in Chicago on May 4th.

Sure, I'll be missing important classes.
Yes, I'll be driving fourteen hours in two days.
Yeah, I might have to send some bogus emails to my professors.

But you know what?

Bonding with my sister is important and I'd still do Rivers. So HA.

And I haven't even bought any alcohol yet!

Wed, 06 Apr 2005 19:35:48 GMT

Flowers + Caribbean rum + phone calls + dinner at Addison's = one fabulous bithday...

And it's only 2:30!

P.S. Erin, that was the cutest e-card ever. (Also, I would totally eat the frosting first.)